


Birdcage Capacity

by norenzine, thebluesweater



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Blood and Gore, Fluff, M/M, Making Out, Pining, Recreational Drug Use, Smoking, Supernatural Elements
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-23
Updated: 2018-10-23
Packaged: 2019-08-06 09:00:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16385138
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/norenzine/pseuds/norenzine, https://archiveofourown.org/users/thebluesweater/pseuds/thebluesweater
Summary: Ex-roommates shenanigans, stupid pet names, a whole lot of pining, and a surprise random ghost appearance.Renjun concluded his life couldn’t be more thrilling than that.





	Birdcage Capacity

**Author's Note:**

> This is for PROMPT #7.
> 
> Hello! This is probably so far from what my prompter was expecting and I apologize in advance for that. I tried my best to include the prompt and put my own twist/plot in it.
> 
> I hope you still enjoy it.

“Do you really have to leave, roomie?”

Renjun sighed at Jeno’s whines. He had already packed all of his things in boxes and sent them beforehand to the West building where the dorm rooms were much bigger and in the style of a small apartment, compared to the one Jeno and him were staying at in the North building. Jeno, his roommate who’s currently wrapped around one of his arms like an octopus, his head propped on Renjun’s shoulder, kept stopping him from proceeding with his transfer. He was adamant that Renjun should just stay with him. It was quite adorable and Renjun couldn’t help but be flattered by it.

However, Renjun had already signed all the necessary papers and his new room was already waiting for him.

“Yeah. I’m sorry but we talked about this before, right? I originally signed up for the West building because I need a bigger space to store my canvases but since they had a lot of reservations, they put my application on pending and will put me on priority for the next semester. Now, there’s a vacancy and they already called me up for the room, Jeno.” Renjun mindlessly pet Jeno’s head on his shoulder as he recounted and rechecked if all the things he needed were inside his bag now.

“But it’s a hassle to find a new roommate.” Jeno whined causing Renjun to let out a snort. They only had been roommates for almost a year but to the two, that didn’t stop them from having an easy and grounded friendship with each other. Renjun was happy about it and it seemed like Jeno felt the same way considering he was reluctant to let Renjun go now. “And we already bonded! You and I have a connection already, Injun.”

“I kept reminding you last semester to submit the vacancy form already.”

“I was hoping you’d get rejected again.”

“God, why am I friends with you?” Renjun snapped his head to the side, wanting Jeno to see the disbelief in his expression but instead his nose bumped on the crown of Jeno’s head and he got a whiff of the other’s mint shampoo. Flustered, Renjun pushed Jeno’s head off his shoulder, causing the other to let out a smug grin as he let Renjun go. Suddenly, he felt cold without the other’s body heat warming his side but even if that was the case, he held his ground and tried to keep the faux disbelieving frown on his face a little longer.

Jeno poked his arm. “Jeno’s fine. No need to call me God.”

“Insufferable. I’m leaving.” Shaking his head, Renjun got up.

“My dorm is always open for you, my love!” Jeno hollered from inside their- _room 308_. Renjun should probably stop referring to Jeno’s room as _their_ room from now on.

“Piss off.” Renjun sniped but his reddening cheeks betrayed the snark in his voice. Jeno had always had a knack for calling him ridiculous pet names, said it was a way to get closer when they just started being roommates. Even though it stuck through time, Renjun still wasn’t used to it. He probably would never.

\---

“Hey! Hi, man, I’m Lucas. You’re so cute and tiny!” Renjun startled and almost dropped his bag when Lucas’ loud voice welcomed him after the door to his new room opened. The other was tall- way taller to Renjun’s dismay- and he had a warm smile plastered on his small face. His eyes were big and so was his mouth. It should look ridiculous on any person, but Lucas just looked handsome.

Renjun mentally shook his head. _Beautiful people and their ability to punch through science and logic_.

This was also his thought when he first met Jeno before. Jeno was all sharp angles and lines but it didn’t stop the other from looking like he came out of a teenage dream. It was almost funny how Renjun had a huge crush on the other during their first week rooming together. Now, Renjun considered Jeno one of his closest friends. That he _still_ may or may not harbor a little crush on. Just a little harmless crush on his friend. If Renjun didn’t act upon it (and he had no plan to), it wouldn’t harm their friendship and he liked for it to stay that way.

“Oh… thanks?” Renjun answered, smiling awkwardly as he looked up at Lucas. Sometime in his new dorm life, Renjun would probably have a cramp in his neck while talking to Lucas. He offered his hand to the other and introduced himself when Lucas’ big hand wrapped around his for a firm handshake. “Renjun. Hi. You’re my roommate?”

“Me? No. I’m your roommate’s boyfriend. I’m helping him unpack. He just went downstairs to pick up our dinner and talk to someone, I think.” Lucas had a thoughtful look in his face for a moment before he snapped out of it and stepped aside to let Renjun in. “He told me you were coming though. Come in! Let me help you with your things.”

“Ah, really? Thank you so much. Just leave them in front of my room and I’ll do the rest.” Renjun gestured to the boxes next to the door and put his bag on top of one box before lifting it up and entering the apartment style dorm.

“So what are you majoring and what year are you in?” Lucas re-entered with two boxes stacked on his hand and Renjun almost pouted at the sight. How come he was never gifted in the strength and height department? Renjun could only sigh in disappointment.

“Third year in Fine Arts. You?” Renjun answered, opening the door to the right when he saw that the one on the left was opened already and there were opened boxes inside.

“I’m graduating this year. Hopefully. I’m in the Media Relations department.” Lucas set the boxes inside the bare bedroom when they heard shuffling from the small receiving area.

“I got us some Chinese take-out-”

“Baby, I let your roommate in. He’s cute and tiny!” Lucas jumped on the other smaller boy who was holding a plastic bag in his hand, immediately wrapping his arms around the smaller’s waist. The boy had droopy eyes, caramel locks and sunkissed skin. Pretty was an understatement.

“Yukhei, that’s rude.” His new roommate tutted then smiled apologetically at Renjun.

“Calling someone cute?”

“No, weirdo. Calling someone tiny.”

“I didn’t mean it in an offensive way.”

His roommate only rolled his eyes and tapped Lucas’ hands on his waist so the other would let go before he sauntered over to the small table. “Anyway, please ignore him. My name is Donghyuck but you can call me Haechan if you want. I’m your roommate.”

“Yukh...ei?” Confused, Renjun’s gaze traveled back and forth between the two.

“Ah did he introduced himself as Lucas to you?” Donghyuck piped up from where he was opening the Chinese take-out, tilting his head to the side.

“Yeah.”

“Yeah. Lucas is a cool name.” Lucas piped up, sitting on the spot beside Donghyuck.

Donghyuck only chuckled and gestured for Renjun to sit with them on the floor. “It’s his English name. He’s half Chinese and half Thai so he gets to have so many names. You can choose what name to call him. He responds to all of them.” He gave one box of Chinese take-out to Renjun. It was only then that Renjun noticed the three sets of orders for all. Seemed like Donghyuck also ordered for him.

“Okay. Thank you by the way. You didn’t have to order me something.” Renjun smiled and accepted the food, grateful for the thought.

Donghyuck waved a hand to dismiss it. “It’s nothing. I hope you don’t mind that I already chose the other room without talking it over with you though.”

“No. I don’t really mind. I like this side better anyway since the room has a lot of sunlight.”

“Cool. Do you need help unpacking, then? Yukhei and I are almost done with mine.” Donghyuck offered with a bright smile.

“Oh no. I’m alright.” Renjun spoke with a mouthful of rice, hands flailing, then he blushed at his action.

Donghyuck only grinned at him. “Okay. But if you need help just holler at us.”

Nodding, Renjun thought Donghyuck would be the perfect roommate.

\---

Renjun should probably stop assuming things and speaking too soon.

“Renjun?” Jeno greeted in surprise when he opened the door for Renjun. Then, a smug smile slowly formed on his lips. “Ah I knew you’d come running back into my-”

Rolling his eyes, Renjun pushed his way past Jeno and settled on the floor, his back on Jeno’s bed. “Please, I just really need to study for this subject because I have a test tomorrow and I can’t do it in my dorm because nobody told me Donghyuck is a Broadcast Management student and he practices his speeches and reports really loudly.”

“Library exists?” Jeno said, crossing his arms with his brow raised like it was obvious. It was, indeed. But Renjun hated studying at their university library because most students only use it to either take a nap or make out. It was distracting there.

“You know I hate it there.”

“Fine. You’re welcome to use my room anytime you want.” Jeno said with a shrug, relenting because he did know about Renjun’s grudge against the library. After all, Jeno’s one of those people who go to the library for the same reasons. _Both_ reasons.

“Can I really?” he suddenly asked because he’s unsure if Jeno had made previous plans before his untimely arrival.

Renjun looked over to the other side of the room where his bed was now just a skeleton of what used to be, its mattress was stripped bare, the desk was clean and the wall had traces of left over masking tapes on it. It felt empty. Renjun accepted the pang of longing that hit the pit of his stomach, after all, he lived in this room for some time, made memories in it. He figured he was bound to feel some sort of nostalgia returning to the room this quite soon after his departure.

Jeno’s face softened at the solemn expression that he saw on Renjun. “Of course, Renjun.” He answered then closed the door and walked over to his bed, lying on it comfortably before picking up the book he was reading. “Just like how we used to.”

Renjun nodded, appeased. “Thanks Jeno.”

They settled in a comfortable silence as they both read and study their assigned readings from lectures.

Renjun had missed this. The silence of their- _Jeno’s_ room. And most importantly, Jeno’s calming presence. Don’t get him wrong, Donghyuck was really an amazing roommate and Renjun got along with him well. But Donghyuck was nothing like Jeno. While his current roommate was brash and hilarious, Jeno was just the right amount of goofy and soothing.

Jeno was a serene moon.

“So how was your roommate hunting? Any luck on that?” Renjun started when he took a break from studying.

“Not particularly. I’ve submitted a vacancy form to the RA though. That should do it. I’m just waiting for their response.” Jeno’s answer felt a little off to Renjun. He didn’t know why, but somehow this new information, the thought of Jeno getting a new roommate- it didn’t sit well with him and he hated it. Jeno looked at Renjun and grinned. “In the meantime, I’m just enjoying the bachelor life in my bachelor’s pad.”

“And here I thought that you're all sulky and mopey because you missed me.” Renjun leaned on the bed, head falling on to the edge of the mattress as he slouched, peeking up at Jeno through his lashes.

Jeno bopped his nose with his finger. “Oh, I do. I just got over the sulking part already. My heart is still broken by your sudden departure. I’m just good at not showing it.”

“Again, not so sudden if I already told you weeks before.” Rolling his eyes, Renjun tried to bite Jeno’s finger off when the other kept bopping his nose.

Jeno recoiled and went back to reading his book, shrugging nonchalantly. “Semantics.”

Renjun huffed before he went back to studying for another half an hour. When he looked up a little later, Jeno already had his eyes closed, his glasses skewed and the book was dog eared and closed to the side. The sight made his stomach churn in an unexplainable feeling, there was a sudden desire to get close to the other that he hadn’t experienced before. It was palpable from the tips of his finger down to his toes and it honestly scared Renjun. Before the desire spread like a forest wildfire inside him and before he could do anything out of the ordinary, Renjun gently gathered all his studying paraphernalia and shove them as quietly as possible inside his bag, mind racing. His efforts were futile though, because when he got up, Jeno was already rousing from his short nap.

“I should go. It’s getting late.” Renjun whispered right when the other sat up. Jeno rubbed the sleep out of his eyes then fixed his glasses, yawning. It would be easy if Renjun would just-

“Do you want me to walk you?” Jeno croaked, still rumpled from sleep. He looked so soft and Renjun couldn’t help the warmth that spread inside of him at the sight before his eyes. Renjun was tired too and it took all of his will to keep his distance and stop himself  from curling up next to Jeno and just go to sleep.

“Nah, I’m good. Thanks.” Renjun blurted, snapping out of his reverie.

What was he thinking? When he was rooming with Jeno, Renjun had never felt the need to cuddle with the other one, he was content by just talking to Jeno. But here he was now, tempted and about to drop everything just so he could sleep beside the other. He shook his head before walking to the door. Renjun must be really sleepy.

“Yeah. See you.” Jeno mumbled.

“Hmm.”

“Don’t let the aliens capture you.”

Renjun halted in his steps and sent Jeno a glare who looked a bit more awake than before. “Oh my God. Don’t scare me like that, stupid.”

“They’re not real, Renjun.” Jeno groused. Then, he smirked. “But maybe ghosts are?”

“Oh my god, shut up.” Renjun said through gritted teeth before he shut the door close on Jeno’s wild sniggering.

When Renjun was making the short trek to the West building where his bed was waiting for him, he would admit with pride that he watched his surroundings with vigilance for possible unidentified creatures lurking in the shadows.

_I hate Jeno._

\---

“Psst! Jeno!”

Renjun saw the boy snapped his head up to look around his surroundings before his eyes settled on Renjun’s, his face brightening immediately. Jeno had a petite girl under his arm, probably his apple of the week, as Renjun liked to refer to them in his mind. She was really pretty, her hair dyed blonde and cut in a bob. The two made their way to him in the bench outside the library.

“Hey, what’s up, sweet cheeks?” Jeno greeted and the girl giggled good naturedly at his side when Renjun rolled his eyes at the other.

“Seriously, you put up with this?” Renjun pointed at Jeno whose jaw slackened. The girl burst out laughing, making him smile victoriously because he could tell she truly found him funny. She had a face and aura that was easy to get comfortable with. No wonder Jeno looked so fond.

The girl’s laughter smoothly fell into a small smile, her eyes twinkling with mischief. She pecked Jeno’s cheeks who looked affronted for being laughed at by the two. “I actually couldn’t anymore. He’s a lousy date.”

“Hey!-” Jeno protested, pouting when he was immediately cut off.

Renjun grinned and offered a hand. “I don’t believe we’ve met yet. I’m Renjun, Jeno’s friend. And if you happen to finally get tired of this one, I’m free.” He sent a wink to the girl to piss Jeno off more.

“No… Mera’s mine!” Jeno swatted Renjun’s hand away before Mera could even shake it and hugged the girl from the back like a kid.

“I’m not anyone’s.” Mera said in a sing-song voice as she tapped Jeno’s nose with her finger.

“Yep. She’s not anyone’s.”

“Shut up, Renjun. What do you want?” Jeno huffed.

“I was just going to ask you if you’re free later-”

“He’s free now.” Mera extricated herself from Jeno’s limbs, walking away from the two who had equal confusion written on their faces.

“Wait- I am?” Jeno asked, a little bit louder because the girl was already a bit further from them.

“Yes! I can’t study in the library if I have your tongue in my mouth.” Mera shouted, earning scandalized glances from passersby which she just ignored. Renjun’s a bit fonder than before. He liked this girl. “I’ll call you later, Jeno. Nice meeting you, Renjun!”

“I think you’re my soulmate! Please, consider my offer.” Renjun shouted back.

Jeno was blushing profusely when he finally got back from the shock. He sputtered, “I’m not- I don’t-”

“Let it go, man.” Renjun sighed dreamily at the retreating back of the girl. Jeno hit the back of his head, earning a loud yelp from him. “Hey!”

“Stop trying to steal my girl with your cute face. It’s not fair. You know everyone falls for that.”

Renjun smirked. “Even you?”

“Of course.” Jeno looked at Renjun with an expression like it was the obvious answer. Renjun, with his former faux bravado dissipating into the air as quickly as it came, panicked and hit Jeno in the stomach, making the other double over and groan as Renjun’s cheeks reddened. “Shit. What was that for?!”

“I’m sorry!” Flailing and apologetic, he frantically hovered over Jeno not knowing what to do to help the other ease the pain he had caused.

“It’s fine. Let’s just sit.” Jeno winced, a hand on his stomach. Renjun pouted and obeyed Jeno’s request, helping the other sit down on the bench. How could he be so careless and dumb? “What do you need me for later anyway?” The other asked when the pain ceased a while later.

“I heard about this urban legend in the West dormitory and thought I’d share it with you.” Renjun peered at Jeno’s expression, cautious. “But you’re pissed at me so maybe I won-”

“No. I told you it’s fine. You can tell me.” Jeno focused his full attention on him, eyes earnest, as he turned his body to Renjun and put his arm to where their backs rested.

Renjun narrowed his eyes, ignoring the fact that they were so close to each other now. “Are you sure?”

Jeno shrugged. “I don’t have anything to do today. Besides, I like hearing you talk about your ghost stuff.”

“You say that yet you still don’t believe in them.”

“I will once I experience it. But for now, I like seeing you so invested in them. It’s fun.” Jeno serenely replied.

Renjun’s heart swelled in joy. Like reading a book, he could tell that Jeno was genuine with his words. There was no mischief in the other’s eyes, no malice, no mockery- just naked interest. Unwarranted happiness at the attention enveloped him, hitting him like powerful tide. It scared Renjun a little so he settled for the reply he was most comfortable with.

“Fun in a good way or bad way?”

“Good way.” Jeno backed away a little. “Do you really have so little faith in me?”

“Bold of you to assume I have faith in you at all.” Easy banter was what Renjun was comfortable with. This, he thought, he could deal with this.

“Oh, you’re so full of shit. I’m out of he-”

“I’m joking! I’m joking!” Giggling, Renjun grabbed Jeno’s torso as the other pretended to get up. Then, he fluttered his eyelashes as he peered at Jeno from under them. “Don’t leave, please? I’m sorry.”

“I’m only staying because you’re cute and you’re letting me call you supreme burrito for the rest of the week.”

“Ew. But okay.”

Renjun thought Jeno would still stay even if he didn’t agree with his ridiculous plan. He knew that the other would stay no matter what.

\---

Startling himself awake, Renjun wiped the slight dribble of drool on his cheek. His neck had a tick of uncomfortable pain in it but Renjun thought it was bearable at most. He must’ve fallen asleep while reading the last pages of their assigned chapter this week in Art History because when he turned to check the time on his phone, the clock said that it was a little after midnight.

Renjun got up from the chair and stretched, yawning and bleary eyed. “Jeno, let’s go eat ramen-”

He stopped. _Oh. Right._

The silence that followed in his room when Renjun suddenly closed his mouth shut was like a blatant reminder that Jeno wasn’t his roommate anymore, and that it had been a month since he moved out from room 308. Renjun was so used to his and Jeno’s routine of going out at midnight to eat convenience store ramen that his mind had forgotten that it’s not a thing anymore. Sadness settled in his gut.

Renjun thought about sending a message to Jeno and inviting him out to hang out at their usual store but it was late at night and he didn’t think it was right to bother the other. It felt as if there was a sudden distance between him and Jeno that Renjun couldn’t cross. He hated it. But there was nothing he could do about it since he was the one who wanted to move out and get a bigger space.

Sighing, Renjun shrugged on a coat and left his room. Maybe he should just invite Donghyuck out? But was Donghyuck even in his room? Renjun remembered the other telling him in a rush that he had a party to go to, so he figured his roommate would be home really late and decided to just go by his lone self.

The night was calm and the sky was clear when Renjun got out of his building. The street was well lit and the road was littered with a few passing cars so Renjun went on his way to the convenience store without much thought. The breeze felt nice on his skin, not too cold and just enough. When the store appeared in his line of sight, an intense aching thought that Jeno should be with him right now, on his side, chattering his ears away hit Renjun. He quickly dismissed the thought and entered the convenience store. There was no use getting all melancholic over it, he mused. Change was the only constant thing in this life.

Renjun quickly paid for his ramen, poured hot water in it and sat on his usual place by the window, mindlessly waiting for the noodles to be cooked. The cashier had his radio on and some old love song was playing quietly in the background to fill the deafening silence in the almost empty store. Renjun was counting the time in his mind when he heard the door opened by the signal of bells and paid it no mind, opening the lid of the container to see if it was already cooked. Renjun couldn’t help but let out a small smile, remembering how Jeno used to scold him for always doing that, saying-

“It won’t cook properly if you keep opening the lid, Injun-ah.”

Renjun snapped his head to the direction of the voice and was stunned to see Jeno standing there with a ramen container on his hand, scowling at Renjun’s fingers that were still holding the lid open. Blinking, he watched as Jeno walked towards him and sat on the empty chair on his left. There was a flutter in Renjun’s stomach as he got a whiff of the other’s comforting scent. Jeno smelled like his mint shampoo,  cold rain and a scent that Renjun would only associate with Jeno.

“How many times have I told you not to do that?” Jeno clucked his tongue and carefully removed Renjun’s hand away from the lid, closing it with his other. He was so close to Renjun, the heat their bodies emit were mixing and he felt the urge to bury his nose on Jeno’s jacket.

Jeno was so warm and his face was so close. If only Renjun could lean in and reach-

“Take a picture. It’ll last longer.” Jeno said with his brows raised, looking at Renjun. The quirk of his lips hinted a shadow of an amused smile.

Renjun snapped out of his trance, hiding his embarrassment in a snort. What was he thinking?

“Yeah, right. As if.”

Then, Jeno grinned slyly. “You missed me, don’t you?”

 _Yes._ “What? No.”

Jeno laughed and pointed at Renjun’s face. “You know you can’t lie. Your face said it all. I missed you too, baby cakes.”

Rolling his eyes, Renjun lightly pushed Jeno away from him. “Whatever.” He mumbled. It was easier when he and Jeno were still roommates, Renjun concluded. Because then, he didn’t have any room to miss Jeno as he was always seeing the other. Now, though, it was different. It was as if the sudden lack of Jeno in his daily life only made his harmless crush on him grow into a full blown infatuation. The fact that his ex-roommate was always playful and naturally flirty at the same time did not help his cause at all. Only then Renjun realized that his heart was beating like he had just ran a marathon. “Let’s just eat before the noodles get soggy.”

“Sure.” Jeno shrugged, easily dropping the topic. His eyes were still smiling like they knew Renjun was feeling out of his element in that moment, like Jeno knew his presence tonight had a big impact on Renjun. Seriously, the other’s existence was like a torment to Renjun. He’s too much of Renjun’s type to ignore.

“So, what were you doing here?” Renjun asked moments later after his heart had calmed down, blowing on the hot noodles.

“I got hungry. So, I went out. I sent you a message, though. But you didn’t reply so I figured you were asleep already. Imagine my surprise when I saw you here.” Jeno grinned, bumping Renjun’s shoulders with his. “You know I only do this with you.”

Renjun’s breathing faltered and the flutter in his stomach went alive again. Jeno wanted to hang out with him. This? Eating store bought ramen noodles at the wee hours of the night? This was theirs. Jeno knew it. Jeno remembered it. Jeno held it in a special place in his heart just like Renjun did. Probably not but he could dream a little. And Renjun couldn’t be happier about it.

“I haven’t checked my phone yet. Sorry.” Renjun said instead, feeling like there was a storm inside of him. Why was he so happy about the fact that Jeno felt the same way about this just like he did? Jeno was his friend and his crush. That’s right. Jeno was his _crush-friend_ and Renjun felt happy that he had something special to share with his crush-friend.

“It’s okay. You’re here anyway. That makes it so much better than eating alone.”

Renjun hid his blush with a cough.

“Renjun?” A familiar voice said from behind him.

Looking back, Renjun saw Donghyuck standing in one of the aisles, holding a water bottle and looking gorgeous in his smudged eyeliner and skin tight jeans. Donghyuck beamed at him when he realized he was right and sauntered over.

“Hey, Donghyuck.” Renjun smiled. “Are you coming home from the party?”

“Yep. Didn’t expect to see you here at this time of the night, though.” Donghyuck eyed Jeno then turned to Renjun with a sly grin. “And with a date at that.”

“No! What? He’s not my boyfriend. He’s my ex-roommate.” Renjun flailed his hands, flustered at the accusation. Jeno was just chuckling at the side. As much as he was crushing really hard on Jeno, Renjun wouldn’t want anyone to assume that he and Jeno were in a romantic relationship because that might make the other feel uncomfortable with him. And Renjun didn’t want that happening. It was more convenient for both of them that way since he knew Jeno only sees him as a friend and was far more romantically interested in other people. Renjun would rather have what they have now than nothing at all.

Donghyuck raised an eyebrow. “Okay. Sorry. My mistake.” He said in a tone that clearly speak of his doubt.

“It’s fine. By the way, Jeno, this is Donghyuck, my roommate. Donghyuck, this is Jeno, my friend and my ex-roommate.” Renjun introduced and the two exchanged pleasantries.

“I gotta go. I still have a morning class later.” Donghyuck said after looking at his watch. “See you at the dorm, Renjun. Don’t stay out too late. It was nice meeting you, Jeno.” The boy waved them goodbye before heading out to the cashier to pay for his purchase, then leaving the store.

“You didn’t tell me your roommate’s hot.” Jeno sent him an accusing stare as soon as Donghyuck left their sights.

“Well, I didn’t think it was necessary?” Renjun said. “Also, he has a boyfriend and you have Mera. So, back off, Jeno.”

“What? I didn’t say anything.”

Narrowing his eyes, Renjun pursed his lips. “Yeah, you don’t have to.”

“You’re just jealous, my cute, cuddle bunny-” Jeno leaned in with a smug smile plastered on his face. Then, his smile morphed into a pout.

“There’s nothing to be jealous about, stupid-” Renjun proceeded to continue eating his ramen that got colder, swatting Jeno’s attempts at pinching his cheek.

“Also, Mera broke up with me.”

“Oh.” Renjun stopped short with his movements to gauge the other’s expression. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“It’s whatever.” Jeno sniffed then shrugged, brushing off the topic.

However, when the two finally separated that night and when Renjun’s all brushed his teeth and washed his face, he hit the bed and wondered if the slight recoil in his stomach when Jeno showed interest in Donghyuck then was that feeling called jealousy.

\---

Renjun’s phone rang just when his character in the game was shot dead.

“Shit! Dammit. I was so close to killing him.” Renjun groaned and Jeno just chuckled from his side, eyes focused on his own character in his laptop, still alive and in perfect condition, hiding in one of the buildings. Huffing, Renjun picked the call up.

“Yes? Hello.”

“Renjun, someone’s looking for you here. They said their name was Sicheng.” Donghyuck said from the other line and Renjun gasped. He totally forgot about Sicheng asking to borrow some of his paint brushes.

“Crap. Yeah. I’ll be there in a minute. Just let him wait for a moment.”

Dropping the call, Renjun quickly got up and closed his laptop, quickly gathering it in its respective bag before dashing out of Jeno’s room, not caring at all if he left any of his things.

“Wait- Injun-ah! Where are you going? Ah, really-” Renjun heard Jeno complained in a startle before the door closed.

He was hanging out in Jeno’s room again to study, but they ended up playing _PUBG_ like how they used to do when they were still roommates. It was a familiar routine that Renjun and Jeno easily got back into. Renjun had enjoyed hanging out with the other so much that he lost track of time. Now he’s rushing over to get to his room and sweating.

 _This is all Jeno’s fault_. Exercise was not made for Renjun, apparently. He was huffing and red in the face when he reached his dorm.

“Sorry! Sorry, I know. I forgot. My bad.” Renjun burst into the room, startling Donghyuck and Sicheng who seemed to be watching some rerun of _Doctor Who_ with the Tenth Doctor.

Relief washed over Sicheng’s face and Renjun winced. The poor boy had been blasting his phone with messages since an hour ago but Renjun was too occupied with hanging out with Jeno that he didn’t even bothered to check the time.

Technically, it was really Renjun’s fault. But he liked to blame things on Jeno just because.

“Thank God, you’re here. I thought you died. I would’ve screamed at your cadaver for not letting me borrow the brushes first before you exhaled your last breath.” Sicheng rambled as he followed Renjun inside his room after thanking Donghyuck for letting him in.

“Wow. Thanks for caring? Why didn’t you call me then?”

“You’re welcome.” The other boy smirked and heavily sat on the edge of the bed, watching Renjun as he waddle through the mess in his room to find the new set of brushes he hadn’t used yet. “And I couldn’t call you since I left my phone charging in Jaehyun’s apartment and I didn’t want to go back then come here again. Too much effort. Where were you, anyway?”

“None of your business, Sicheng.”

“I bet you’re with Jeno again.”

Renjun turned quickly to Sicheng, somewhat flustered. “Why do you always assume that I’m with Jeno whenever I go missing?”

Sicheng raised a hand and started counting. “Let’s see… you never left your dorm before unless if: one- its for school, two- I called you out to hang, three- an emergency and lastly, four- Jeno Lee. So don't lie to me and give me that attitude.”

“Hey! I have friends other than you and Jeno, you know.” Sicheng only raised a doubtful eyebrow at him as an answer to his statement which made Renjun pull an incredulous expression. “It’s true! You can check my contact list if you want.”

“Name one person who you called in the past week besides me. Donghyuck is excluded because he’s your roommate.”

“I-” _Jeno_.

“Exactly.” Sicheng laughed victoriously but to Renjun, he sounded like Satan himself.

Renjun huffed, flustered so he just opted to shove the brush set on the other’s chest so he would shut up. Sicheng did, wheezing with great effort at the pain in his chest.

“Ouch! You little devil! That really hurt.”

“ _Exactly._ ” Renjun pettily mocked before shooing Sicheng out of their dorm room.

“Go away now. I don’t need you tainting the very air of where I sleep in, demon.” Renjun was pushing Sicheng by his shoulders as the other whined about how they should spend more time together but still gave in to Renjun’s whims.

If he was being honest, Sicheng could easily just stand there and plant his feet on the ground and Renjun wouldn’t even be able to move him an inch. The other just really liked annoying Renjun plus- Sicheng had not received any answer from Renjun as to where he was just now. Renjun would like for it to stay that way because if Sicheng knew he was with Jeno, he’d never hear the end of it.

When they opened the door, though, Renjun was stumped to see Jeno there, sheepishly holding his hand in the air, ready to knock.

“Oh. Hi, Renjun.” Jeno grinned and turned to nod at Sicheng who was behind Renjun. “Sicheng.” He added as a greeting.

Renjun was frozen in his place and he could practically feel Sicheng’s mind buzzing beside him. He turned to his friend, sending him a tight lipped smile.

“Sicheng, aren’t you leaving?” Renjun asked, faux politeness coming out of his mouth but the blatant glare directed towards the other spoke volume. Renjun _knew_ that glint in the Sicheng’s eyes.

“In a little bit.” Sicheng grinned, clearly enjoying the taste of Renjun’s defeat.

Renjun sighed and gave up, turning to Jeno. “What are you doing here?” He asked with the tilt of his head as he address the other.

“Your other bag. You left in such a rush that you forgot this in my room. You had your paper due tomorrow stored in there.” Jeno lifted Renjun’s backpack.

Renjun felt heat crept up in his cheeks. Traitors.

“And now that’s my cue to leave. Talk to you later, Renjun. Thanks for the paint brushes. Bye.” Sicheng hurried to go past Jeno and leave but not before turning around and sending a wink at him behind Jeno’s back. Renjun would scold him later for it.

“Thanks, Jeno.” Renjun said as the other handed him his bag. He hugged it tightly and shifted on his feet awkwardly. “Do you want to come in?”

“Nah. We played for hours already. I’ve got a paper to finish and I’m not even halfway through it.”

“You didn’t tell me! I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s not your fault.”

“I feel like it is since I’m the one who invited you to play.”

“And I agreed because I wanted to. Case closed.” Jeno reached to ruffle Renjun’s hair. He almost preened. _Almost_. “Anyway, I gotta jet. See you later, pumpkin pie.”

“Ugh. When will you ever stop with the weird pet names? It’s giving me the chills.”

“Never, my sweetest mashed potato!”

“That one doesn’t even make sense!” But Renjun was only answered with the echo of Jeno’s carefree laughter and it brought back the flutters in his stomach. Hurriedly, Renjun closed the door, idly thinking that it would give a stop to the flutters as well. It didn’t.

“What’s your friend’s name again? He’s really cute. Does he have a girlfriend? Boyfriend?” Donghyuck asked with a tilt of his head when Renjun placed his bag on the table. Startling, Renjun turned to the other boy who was sitting on the bean bag on the floor. He forgot that Donghyuck was still there.

“Aren’t you and Lucas boyfriends?” Renjun stopping in his tracks.

“We broke up.” Donghyuck shrugged nonchalantly.

“Oh.”

“What? You think I’m gonna two time Yukhei? I’m not like that Renjun.” Donghyuck said, chuckling, then he stood up and wrapped his arms on Renjun’s, clinging like a koala and fluttering his eyelashes at him exaggeratedly. “What I am though, is a roommate in need of your matchmaking skills. Help me score a date with your cute friend…?”

“Jeno.” Renjun breathed out, supplying the name instinctively and staring at Donghyuck like he grew a new head. Dread settled in his bones for some reason Renjun couldn’t decipher. _You’re just jealous_ , Jeno’s words rang loud in his mind. But that should be impossible? He had no reason to be jealous of. Jeno wasn’t his to get possesive over and Renjun was used to people falling over Jeno’s feet. Renjun had been a witness to Jeno’s numerous girl or boy of the week. There was no romantic relationship between them to warrant what Renjun was feeling right now.

“Right. Jeno. That.”

“I don’t have that kind of power over him.” Renjun said instead, because it was true and because he wasn’t really sure what to do.

“Please? Just one date and I’ll do the rest from there.”

“I-I’ll see what I can do.”

Donghyuck grinned at him and jumped up and down excitedly.

Renjun felt like his bones were lead.

**\---**

“Move.” Renjun stood beside the chair, staring down at Jeno who was already comfortable on his seat, a popcorn in his embrace. He looked comfortable.

Jeno scoffed at Renjun and looked incredulously on the two empty seats beside him. “You’re so stingy. I already sat in here. And there are so many vacant seats left around us. This is _my_ seat already.”

“And _that_ is my popcorn you’re eating so move and change seats with me. We both know that this is the best seat to watch the movie.”

“Say please.” Jeno sent him a smirk, eyes glinting in mischief. Renjun’s heart stuttered. But instead on pondering over what Jeno had just said, Renjun made a show of grabbing his popcorn.

“I’m taking my popcorn and the drinks to sit over the-”

“Okay. Okay. Jeez can’t even take a joke.” Jeno pouted, standing. He plopped onto the next chair with a huff and glared daggers at Renjun. He looked so sulky that Renjun sniggered. Casually, Renjun slid on the now vacant seat and grabbed the popcorn from Jeno’s arms. Jeno grumbled. “I hope you feel the need to pee in the middle of the film and miss the best parts.”

“Not gonna happen, Lee.”

Jeno’s glare turned into a look of amusement. “Isn’t this film horror? Don’t you hate scary things? Why do you always watch these?”

“I hate it that’s why I love it.” Renjun explained as the trailers for future films play before them in the almost empty cinema.

“You don’t make sense.” Jeno shook his head then grabbed the popcorn, putting it on his lap and scooting closer to Renjun. Somehow, Renjun’s senses were suddenly hyper aware of every movement from Jeno. “We could’ve watched another movie. Or the reshowing of _Iron Man_ on Cinema 12 because that’s what intellectuals watch..”

“But we’ve already watched that so many times, Jeno.” Renjun whined, putting his head on Jeno’s shoulder after much contemplation, getting comfortable. It would be weirder if he didn’t since they were both used to this kind of position when they watch films together. “I love _Iron Man_ too but _Hereditary_ is good. The people of _Rotten Tomatoes_ have spoken.”

“How can you believe _Rotten Tomatoes_ when movies appeal differently to everybody?” Jeno craned his neck to look at Renjun’s pout and let out a small chuckle. Renjun only made a face at him before reaching into the popcorn box and eating, then offering some to Jeno which the other gladly opened his mouth for. Jeno’s lips touched the tips of his fingers and it sent a shiver down Renjun’s spine. Like usual, Renjun ignored the feeling, because Jeno had always been… naturally touchy. And he looked expectant of Renjun’s answer.

“That’s why we have to watch it. So we would know if they’re right or not about this one.”

Jeno narrowed his eyes. “You’re such a smooth talker.”

Jeno definitely let Renjun win again. He always did. Most of the time in the past when they hang out to watch something on Netflix when they’re feeling too lazy to go out to the theaters, Jeno would try and put up a fight but in the end, he would always let Renjun choose the movie of the night. He just liked teasing Renjun, and Renjun loved bickering with Jeno.

“I know.” Grinning cheekily, Renjun took the popcorn from Jeno and moved to grab Jeno’s hand so he could put it around himself. Renjun sighed and settled into the warmth. “You’re so warm.” He breathed.

“No. You just get so cold easily. I swear you’re not human.” Jeno mumbled. But still, he gathered Renjun’s smaller stature to himself.

“You’re right. I’m part of the undead society.”

The two ended up sniggering quietly like little kids after a few seconds of trying to stay serious.

The theater was almost winter cold with only a few of the audience, including them, scattered here and there, most of them were couples. Not that Renjun was thinking that Jeno and him were anything of the like. It just so happened that the tickets he got were for this schedule, which was also the last full showing of the movie that day, playing it at almost midnight. And Jeno and Renjun had always been both cuddly so their position was nothing new to them. It was only natural.

The movie started slowly, but it left enough enticing plot drivers for the two to be hooked and stayed until the end to deem that for once, _Rotten Tomatoes_ was right about this one. The film was fantastic and well executed. If Renjun ended up screaming at one part and burying himself on the other’s calming presence beside him, it was only reflex that prompted Jeno’s arm to tighten around the other. As the movie finished and they piled out of the cinema, the two didn’t separate, convincing themselves that it was because Renjun was cold and not acknowledging the curious stares they were receiving from the passersby.

“Well, that was a good movie.”

Jeno started as soon as they entered his room. They were huddled together to keep each other warm and also, Renjun was feeling sleepy and tired all of a sudden. And they both knew a sleepy Renjun was a like a drunk Renjun.

“Yeah. I’m always right.” Renjun grinned and clung to Jeno. The other patted Renjun’s head and chuckled, the tremors of his laughter sending waves of vibration to Renjun’s body, making him feel dizzt but in a fuzzy, comfortable way. It was weird, but Renjun was drunk in sleepiness and exhaustion so he just let himself be.

“Come on. Let’s get you out of your jacket and shoes. And put you in a more comfortable clothes.” Jeno detached himself from Renjun’s grabby hands and went to rummage for some clothes in his dresser. Renjun just stood there, watching the other and missing him already even though Jeno was just on the other side of the room. Sometimes, Renjun couldn’t understand himself. “Here.” Jeno sauntered to him, a familiar yellow hoodie in his hands.

“That… is mine.” Renjun blinked dumbly at the piece of clothing.

Jeno’s eyebrows raised, amused. “Yeah, you left it a while ago when you came over to study. Don’t worry, I already washed it so it’s clean.”

Renjun’s lips parted and accepted the hoodie gingerly. He had to stop himself from sniffing the hoodie to confirm if it smelled like Jeno, _in front_ of Jeno. “That’s really thoughtful of you.” He said instead.

Jeno snorted and turned his back again, a signal that he was giving Renjun privacy to change clothes. Renjun with all his sluggishness and the sleep teetering inside him, dressed as carefully and hurriedly as he could possibly do.

“Yeah, right. You’re gonna have to pay me for storage fee since you leave a lot of things behind and I have to take care of them. Some of your books and clothes are here, you know. Honestly, what would you do without me?”

“Die in a ditch, probably.” Renjun mumbled, discarding his jeans and folding them neatly on top of Jeno’s dresser.

Jeno looked over to him, eyeing Renjun’s choice of sleepwear. Boxers and hoodie. “Right.” Jeno cleared his throat. Renjun turned to the bed and hopped on it, oblivious to the other’s eyes that lingered on his exposed thighs for a quick moment. “Don’t sleep on the side near the wall.”

Renjun waved a hand, already tucking himself underneath Jeno’s blanket, finding a comfortable position. “I know, I know. I wouldn’t want to sleep there anyway. Too cold for my liking.”

“You’re too weak, my spicy licorice.” Jeno gave a sickeningly sweet smile to Renjun and he laughed.

“Ugh. That’s horrible. Where do you even get those pet names? And no. Just don’t wanna freeze to death.” Jeno’s bed obviously smelled like Jeno and Renjun inhaled the scent greedily. It smelled cool and minty yet warm and something akin to forest woods at the same time. Just like it’s owner. In his exhausted state, a fleeting thought passed in his mind: he could get used to this. Renjun felt at peace.

The bed dipped and soon, Jeno was lying on his spot beside Renjun with a gentle smile on his lips and looking soft in his shirt and shorts.

This was Renjun’s ex-roommate and one of his closest friend. One of the few people who had seen him at his worse, who accepted all of him and stuck with him through thick and thin. The person who always picked up after Renjun’s messes, literally and metaphorically. The person who had Renjun’s back no matter what. Jeno, who was ever so shining, so unfairly beautiful and amazing.

Jeno, who Renjun shouldn’t be feeling all these unnamed and complicated emotions for within him that was cascading like water to a river through a broken dam. That was Jeno, Renjun’s ex-roommate and friend.

Because Renjun had a task he had already committed to. And he had to say it now or he would never do it ever.

“Jeno.” Renjun breathed, catching Jeno’s stare. He parted his lips, but the words got stuck in his throat and refused to come out. Renjun had to do it, he had to say what he had been pushing far away.

“What is it?” Jeno asked, urging him to speak. The lull in his voice made Renjun want to just succumb to his selfishness and keep Jeno for himself. But he knew Jeno didn’t like him like that, and Jeno wasn’t a property he could just take dibs on.

So, Renjun spoke and let his mind be put on automatic mode. “Remember Donghyuck?” He whispered, his own voice sounded foreign to him. When Jeno nodded, it felt as if a dead weight was dropped on his stomach. But Renjun continued. “He… asked me if he could have your number.”

Jeno blinked, searching his face for something for a second. Then, he licked his chapped lips. “Did you give it?”

“No. I wanted to ask first if it was alright with you.” Renjun hated how empty he felt inside compared to how stable he was making himself look on the outside. His face was devoid of all emotions and Jeno looked like he was contemplating his answer. _Please say no_.

“Give it to him.” Jeno shrugged. “I don’t mind.”

Renjun bit the inside of his cheek so hard to stop his protest. “Okay.” He said instead. “I’ll give Donghyuck your number.” But why did Renjun somehow feel that he was going to give Donghyuck more than that?

Jeno quickly fell asleep after their conversation. But Renjun was left with a heavy heart and the tangible metallic flavor that exploded on his taste buds a while ago. If someone would ask Renjun what defeat was like, he would say it tasted like blood and sleep deprivation. It smelled like mint and forest. And despite of the warm body snuggling next to his, Renjun felt cold.

**\---**

Donghyuck and Jeno had been going out for more than a week now. Renjun knew this because everytime they do, Jeno would pick Donghyuck up in their dorm. He would hang out with Renjun if he’s a little too early and wait while Donghyuck dresses up in the next room.

The two seemed to be having fun and enjoying each other’s company, and Renjun was genuinely happy for his two friends. He still hadn’t come to terms with the not-so-foreign feeling he’s come to get to know and tamped down over the past few days, but all things considered, Renjun was okay with Jeno and Donghyuck going out. Donghyuck was a great person, Renjun thought he deserved to be happy, and if that happiness was brought by Jeno, who’s he to stop that?

Jeno had always been a carefree, enjoying the most of everything. He always knew what he wanted, knew his limits, knew what his partner needed. Renjun could attest to that, for all the years they had been roommates, Jeno’s never had a bad break up. All his past partners were still his friend and if not, you just could tell that they parted on a good note. Never once had Renjun encountered an ex of Jeno that bad-mouthed the other. It was weird at first, but as Renjun got to know Jeno through the year, he understood why.

Jeno always gave his best in any relationship he’s had. No gray areas, no hesitation, no regrets.

“As my roommate and friend, you’re required to attend my party next Friday. You have to wear a costume, though, since it’s a Halloween party.” Donghyuck greeted Renjun one morning. He had no classes for that day and he was just eating his toast until Donghyuck came out of his room, already dressed for his mid-morning class.

“Party?” Renjun parroted. “But I don’t have any costumes.”

Donghyuck gave him a blank look. “Don’t give me that excuse, Mister. Just go as a zombie, put fake blood on your clothes and tear them a little. That would do.”

“Zombies are generic.” Renjun rolled his eyes. Then, he sighed. “But fine, I’ll find something to wear that fits my taste.” Squealing, Donghyuck skipped over to give Renjun a one-arm hug, then stealing one of his toasts and running to the front door before Renjun could open his mouth to protest.

“Oh! And don’t forget to relay the invitation to Jeno. You two can come together.”

“Aren’t you going with him?”

Donghyuck looked at Renjun like he was growing another head for a moment, then his face cleared from realization and he chuckled. “Oh. I wasn’t going with Jeno. I’m going with this cute guy from my Public Speaking class, Jaemin.”

Renjun blinked, confused. “Aren’t you and Jeno going out, though? Wait, who’s Jaemin?”

“Exactly, sweetie. We’re going out. Technically, he’s not my boyfriend yet. And Jaemin’s the other guy I’m seeing at the moment.” Donghyuck observed Renjun’s unreadable expression for a moment then added, “If you’re worried about Jeno, dont. He knows what he signed up for and he’s cool with it.”

“I know that.” Renjun licked his lower lip and nodded. “I’ll call him later about it. But text him if you can!”

“Yes, I will. Bye!” Donghyuck said before he closed the front door and left.

One thing Renjun forgot to mention about Jeno’s relationships: they were all casual and not so serious ones. Maybe that was why Jeno has never had a bad break up, because everyone knew that the endgame of it all would be friendship and nothing more. Renjun wanted friendship _and_ something more, but he knew Jeno couldn’t give that to him and he would just end up getting hurt.

“Jeno Lee and his relationships.” Renjun shook his head, sighing. He would probably never understand the casualness of it all, but if everyone was happy, it should be fine, right? It was not just for Renjun.

\---

Music blasted from the speakers, causing the ground to dance and tremble with the bass. Drinks were handed out everywhere, shots were taken down with gleeful cheers and the party was on full swing. Donghyuck made sure that this party was _the_ Halloween Party of the year, Renjun could tell just from the venue.

It was held in an old big house of Donghyuck’s late Aunt, he said. A well maintained, old Victorian-Gregorian two story structure that stood tall amongst the middle of the estate. It wasn’t a big estate, but it was secluded enough not to disturb the neighbors- a perfect place for a party as loud as this. Donghyuck also said no one actually lived here. But some family members would go and visit it from time to time for a little vacation. Renjun’s pretty sure the house would look lovely in the morning but at night and with all the spooky store bought accessories, it fit the haunted house vibe Donghyuck was going for. Renjun would be scared shitless if there wasn’t a party going on.

However, there was, and Renjun had some alcohol in his system, not to mention the second hand smoke he’d had from the people who was having a session inside. It got a bit suffocating for him so he went to one of the empty rooms in the part of the house that was off limits to any other guests. But Renjun had his perks of being the host’s roommate and friend.

The music was muffled as soon as Renjun shut the door behind him. He walked over to the end table where he knew a lamp was situated at and turned it on, basking the room with warm light. He was a little bit surprised that the lamp was still working but he remembered that Donghyuck mentioned before that his family still frequent the house so he figured everything must still be functioning.

Sitting on the settee, Renjun looked around and realized that the room he was in was the small library of the house. His eyes landed on the big windows and ended up opening them to let the night breeze in after much contemplation.

“Renjun?”

“Shit!”

Renjun had startled, clutching his chest in shock before he whipped around to find Jeno on the door, his head poking inside and when he confirmed that its Renjun, he smiled and entered completely.

“Don’t scare me like that!”

Jeno rolled his eyes. “What? You think I’m a ghost or something? They’re not real.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Well, I’ll just have to be proven wrong soon.” Jeno shrugged and sat nonchalantly on the settee Renjun was just sitting on a while ago, putting his feet up on the table.

Frowning, Renjun swatted his legs before sitting beside the other. “Don’t put your feet on the table. That’s rude.”

“Yes, honeybunch.” Jeno grinned and put his feet down, facing Renjun completely.

“What are you doing here, Jeno Lee?” Renjun asked, exasperated already.

“Rude. I came to check up on you. Donghyuck said you got dizzy?” Jeno bit his lower lip and lifted a hand to check Renjun’s temperature, genuine worry evident on his face. “You don’t have a fever at least.” He mumbled.

“I’m fine. I just got a little lightheaded because it was too crowded in there.”

“That’s good. But you could’ve called for me so you won’t have to be alone.” Then, Jeno smirked playfully. “I heard Donghyuck telling some people that this house has a spirit guarding it or something.”

Renjun’s eyes widened and the hair on his arms stood up but he wouldn’t let Jeno get that satisfaction. Good thing he was wearing a robe. “I-I’m fine. I can handle myself!” Renjun stammered and internally cursed himself for doing so. Jeno seemed to notice his inner torment and basked in it, clearly enjoying himself.

“Yes, you can, my pretty little witch.”

“Shut up, I’m a warlock.” Renjun huffed and fixed his _very warlock_ robes consciously. Then, he noticed Jeno fiddling with something. “Is that a blunt?” He asked flat out when he realized the rolled paper between Jeno’s fingers.

“Hmm? Oh yeah. Jaehyun rolled it for me.” Jeno piped up. “Why? Want to light it?”

“Sure.”

They lit the stick and smoked it together, passing the blunt back and forth in a pleasant silence save for the muffled _thump! thump!_ of the music on the walls from the outside. They were both not an avid smoker, but from time to time, they did light up and share one when they were still roommates. They didn’t mind it, it was just to loosen up from the toll of stress the university had put upon them.

“Have you tried to shotgun before?” Jeno mused a little later, glazed eyes staring out of the window, a little dazed. The blunt and the alcohol doing their jobs well blending together in one lazy haze.

Renjun’s tongue felt heavier, but he still replied albeit slowly. “You mean like in a shooting range?”

“No, idiot!” Jeno’s giggled but it soon turned into a full blown laughter and Renjun was confused and a little pissed that he was being left out of the joke. He was about to voice out his protest when Jeno spoke. “I mean shotgunning with a blunt.”

“I don’t know what that is.” Renjun sulked when Jeno looked at him with wide eyes, sparing him a look of shock. “Don’t laugh.” He mumbled.

“Okay. Sorry, I won’t.” Jeno straightened up from his slouch and wiggled his eyebrows. “Want to try it?”

Cautious, Renjun narrowed his eyes at the other. “Does it involve anyone getting hurt anywhere because I won’t do it if that’s so.”

“No one’s going to get hurt, Renjun.”

“Okay then.” Renjun struggled to straightened up from lounging on the settee but Jeno helped him, bouts of giggles escaping their lips. “How do you do it?”

Jeno smirked and fully faced Renjun, resting his arm on the headrest of the couch, the almost finished blunt trapped between his fingers. “Okay, so when you do shotgun, you breathe in the smoke I will blow into you or vice versa. Easy as pie, right?”

“Oh, I get it. Sure.” Renjun nodded.

“Open your mouth.”

“What?”

“Open your mouth and breathe me in.”

“I-” Jeno lifted his free hand and gently cupped the side of Renjun’s face, cutting off whatever retort he had on the tip of his tongue.

“Don’t worry. I won’t hurt you.”

And it seemed as if that was what Renjun’s mind needed to hear because his lips parted willingly and he leaned in, dazed, when Jeno lifted the blunt in his mouth and took a long drag, dilated pupils never leaving Renjun’s. He observed the other, the way Jeno’s cheeks hollowed, the way wisps of smoke escaped his mouth when he pulled the blunt out and tried to contain it inside. Jeno’s lips were blushing red, so red and inviting to Renjun’s slightly intoxicated mind. Jeno’s eyes reflected the warm light and the mesmerizing sight put a halt to Renjun’s racing thoughts.

When Jeno leaned in, he pulled Renjun closer, their mouths just literally centimeters away from one another. It was too intimate, the action. Renjun felt like he was drowning on water and the only person who was keeping him afloat was Jeno and his hold on Renjun. The atmosphere in the room was suddenly charged as Jeno tilted his own head to the side, then guiding Renjun’s head to do the same. Every move was hypnotic and it played out before his eyes like an old movie.

Slowly, but surely, Jeno exhaled the smoke, aiming for Renjun’s opened mouth. And just like that, Renjun closed his eyes and breathed him in. His mind had shut down, filling itself with nothing but his want for Jeno. To get closer to him. To touch him. To feel him under his skin in ways he had never felt before.

Opening his eyes, Renjun was hit by the intensity of Jeno’s gaze, boring into him like he was prey. It sent a shiver down his spine. Jeno’s dark pupils were blown, and Renjun knew that the reason for it was more than just the blunt they had smoked. He was certain of it. Their lips weren’t touching, but he desperately wished they were.

Renjun wanted all of Jeno, and in that moment, all he wanted to do was to give in to his greed.

Crossing the remaining distance between them, Renjun captured Jeno’s lips and was rewarded with a gasp of surprise from the other. The smoke had long vanished into the air and yet, it was replaced with something invisible but as much intense and intoxicating.

When Jeno got over his initial surprise, he reciprocated the kiss and Renjun leaned in further, thirsty for the soft lips that were moving on his, like they were oxygen and he was but a man asphyxiated. Jeno licked his lower lip then, asking for permission, and Renjun gave it to him resolutely. He carded his fingers through Jeno’s silky hair, lightly grabbing it causing the other’s hat to fall with a quiet thud on the settee. He bit Jeno’s lip and it was compensated by a grunt to Renjun’s delight. He wanted to hear more of those kind of sounds from Jeno, especially if they were because of him. Renjun felt dizzy and not because of the alcohol in his system but because of the boy in front of him.

Renjun let out a sigh in the kiss, feeling the desire and gratification seeped through him with every press of their lips. This brought out a satisfied hum from Jeno and prompted him to pull Renjun closer by the waist, urging him to sit on his lap without breaking their liplock. Renjun gladly obeyed, throwing his leg on Jeno’s other side so he could straddle him easily, situating himself on top of the other, grasping on Jeno’s shoulders to balance himself. When Renjun found a comfortable position, he deepened the kiss. His mind was a blur, completely swept away by the fervor waves of lust.

Renjun basked in the intimacy Jeno was giving him, and got drunk in it, swimming in the heat of the other, feeling like the universe had vanished around them and there was nothing else besides him, Jeno, his kisses and his touches on his skin. Renjun hummed in approval when he felt the other’s fingers under his robe, rubbing circles on the bare skin of his hips. Renjun felt burned, and he wanted it.

But.

“W-wait. Jeno-” Renjun was cut off by Jeno’s lips who gave him no time to talk, and Renjun returned the kiss, completely under some kind of spell. He quickly gasped and snapped out of it when he felt Jeno’s blunt nails digging on his skin. “Wait.” Renjun panted, lips tingling and numb.

Jeno gave him a lingering kiss on his lips, open and filthy, before settling his head on the headrest of the settee. Renjun felt himself blush as he took in the sight of the other. Jeno looked as debauched as Renjun felt like. His lips were red, but there was violet lipstick smudged around them courtesy of Renjun’s lipstick, his hair was sticking out everywhere and his chest was heaving to catch his breath. He looked content, dark eyes staring at Renjun. Jeno looked so good under him like this.

Renjun wanted to kiss him stupid again. But he needed to clear some things out. He gulped and cleared his throat to get his mind out of the gutter. It was a hard feat considering Jeno’s hands were still on his skin, leaving faint touches on his lower back and grounding him by his hip, keeping him secured and balanced.

“What about Donghyuck? Aren’t you going out with him?” Renjun asked in a small voice, insecure.

Jeno sent him an amused look, then he let out a small laugh. “Did you stop a good make out session to ask about another boy?”

Renjun lightly hit Jeno’s chest. “Don’t be like that. I’m asking a serious question.”

“Donghyuck and I aren’t boyfriends, Renjun. Our relationship isn’t like that.”

“But he really likes you, you know.”

Sighing, Jeno straightened out causing Renjun to move his hips back slightly. The other lifted a hand and caught a strand of Renjun’s hair, playing with it. Renjun blushed.

“Do you want me to date him seriously, then?”

Renjun frowned. “I mean, he’s nice and he’s my friend. I don’t know.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Renjun asked, tilting his head to the side.

Jeno shrugged. “I’ll see what I can do. Not sure if he’d want that though, knowing Donghyuck. That boy is just looking for fun if I read him correctly.”

“Oh. Okay.” Renjun shifted on his knees, suddenly hyper aware of Jeno’s gaze on him. “Good.” He managed to ramble out for the sake of making the flow of the conversation go smoothly.

Jeno chuckled, sensing his uneasiness. “Do you still want to make out or what?”

“God, I thought you’d never ask.” Renjun mumbled and was planning to catch Jeno’s giggles by his lips when his eyes caught a contour of someone near one of the shelves in the dimmer part of the room.

Startling, Renjun straightened his sitting position and looked right at the person’s direction, profusely flushing red at being caught on someone’s lap. Jeno noticed Renjun’s flustered demeanor and turned his head to where the other was looking at. Renjun couldn’t make out what the other looked like, if he knew him from university or if it was another party crasher who got lost in this part of the house.

“Jesus, man. Have you been there the whole time?” Renjun exclaimed but was met with silence from the other person.

Jeno pursed his lips and tightened his grip on Renjun, suddenly protective. “Hey are you lost? The party’s down the hall. This area are strictly for the host’s close friends only. Sorry, bud.”

More silence.

“Dude, you’re creeping us out. Stop staring-”

“Jeno, I don’t think-” Words got stuck in Renjun’s throat.

They were met with more silence but the person slowly moved away from the darkness with small steps, the light of the lampshade giving character to the person and it turned out to be a woman on the other side of the room, or a girl. She was wearing a tattered dress that looked like it was washed in dirt and bare feet dragging itself towards them. It happened slow and it happened quick. One moment, Renjun was looking at the dirty dress, and the next, the woman’s face came into view and it almost gave his heart a run for its money. Goosebumps formed on his body.

Renjun was petrified in his place and he felt Jeno also tensed up under him.

Fresh and dried blood was staining the woman’s chest, her hands were doused in thick crimson up to her forearms, held up in the air with slight tremors. And her face. Renjun thought he had seen the worst of it all from watching too many horror films but this one was much more horrifying. Renjun felt adrenaline rush through inside him but his knees had already turned into jelly. It looked authentic. No, scratch that. It _felt_ so real.

Renjun wanted to run. But he was frozen in his spot together with Jeno. He couldn’t even turn his gaze away from the woman’s eyes- if they were even eyes to begin with. There were no eyes to look at, just empty, hallowed sockets of flesh. It was like he was being forced to stay there until she reached them. He couldn’t move, his breath coming in short pants.

A whimper escaped Renjun when the woman tried to speak and they saw that she had her tongue cut off, more blood spilling out of her mouth as she made a long hiss of air sound. Renjun finally gathered all the strength he had left and turned away to hide on Jeno’s chest, wishing that the image of her at the back of his eyes would go away as he held on tightly to the other’s shirt. He was truly scared, his body harshly shaking. It seemed like that snapped Jeno out of his stricken state and put his arms around Renjun to shelter him.

“H-hey, that’s a really good costume.” Jeno said, but Renjun knew how hard Jeno’s heart was ramming inside his chest and he realized that Jeno was also disturbed, if not scared, by this. “We- we can go if you want- shit-”

Jeno’s statement was cut off with a loud wheeze of air from the woman. Renjun couldn’t help but peek, only to see the woman vanish into thin air right before their eyes when she was only an arm’s width away from the settee. That was when Renjun knew she was real. His mouth gaped as his heart thundered in his chest, deafening his ears. He couldn’t even scream. Jeno looked spooked, his skin paler than usual and he was looking at the spot where the woman was just standing on before she disappeared like it was the most shocking thing he had ever seen, it probably was.

“What was that…” Jeno croaked, eyes disbelieving and wild when he looked at Renjun who was speechless because of what had just happened. Renjun didn’t know what it was, or his mind refused to believe that he just experienced the kind of terror that clutched his gut and felt like the insides of his stomach was being wrung out left and right. Renjun was about to voice it out when the door opened and the two startled, screaming.

Donghyuck looked surprised at the two, jumping back. “What the fuck are you guys screaming for?” Then, he seemed to take in Renjun and Jeno’s states and put two and two together, his lip quirking into an amused smile. “Seemed like Peter Pan made out with the resident witch.” Donghyuck said, raising his eyebrow at the two and completely oblivious to the horror that just happened a few seconds ago. Renjun couldn’t even say that he was supposed to be a warlock and not a witch, too shaken up to even utter a word.

Renjun and Jeno stayed silent, taking in the normalcy that Donghyuck’s presence had brought and using that time to calm their heartbeats down.

“What? You two looked like you’ve seen a ghost. Untangle now and continue doing whatever you guys were doing back at the dorms because the party’s over and I’m your ride home.” Donghyuck pursed his lips when the two still stayed looking like they won’t move an inch and clapped. “Chop, chop, lovebirds! Let’s go. I’ll meet you guys at the front door.” Donghyuck other man turned around.

With that, Renjun and Jeno caught each other’s gazes and knew exactly what to do. They scurried to fix themselves to look at least presentable, blushing and still kind of spooked. They quickly followed Donghyuck out of the room, anything to leave that place as soon as possible.

When they entered the backseat of the car and Donghyuck spared their intertwined hands a knowing glance, no one said a thing.

“So… you two?” Donghyuck started once they were on the road. Renjun should’ve known his roommate wouldn’t keep his mouth shut about this.

“It was nothing, Hyuck.” Renjun said simply. He looked at Jeno on his side who was staring out of the window and squeezed his hand.

“Yeah. It was nothing.” Jeno belatedly reassured, clearly distracted.

Donghyuck snorted. “Please, I saw Renjun straddling your lap, Jeno. It was anything but nothing.” He spared them a look in the rearview mirror and shake his head before turning his eyes to the road again. “You know, you guys can date right? No one’s stopping you both.”

“Hyuck, just drop it. We’re clearly not in the right state to talk about this.” Jeno said softly, resigned and Donghyuck just shrugged, dropping the topic.

“Okay. If you say so. Just know that you guys have my whole support and blessing.”

They were quiet for the next few minutes, just busy in their own heads with Donghyuck humming the tune of the song on the radio under his breath. Well, at least, they were until Jeno spoke and broke the silence.

“Hey, Hyuck. Did a girl came to the party in a bloodied and muddy dress? She was kind of in the library with us.”

Renjun’s eyes widened and he turned to Jeno, the fear that settled in his bones had resurfaced. Jeno must sensed the distress within Renjun and gripped his hand that was still encased in Jeno’s tighter.

“Oh boy.” Donghyuck only said before he maneuvered to the nearest side street and parked. He turned to the two. “You saw her?”

Confused, Renjun leaned forward. “She’s a guest?”

Donghyuck winced. “Not… really?”

Jeno frowned. “Bullshit.”

“Hey! No cursing in my car and no doubting the driver.” Donghyuck huffed. Then, he turned the volume of the radio all the way down until they couldn’t hear the music anymore. “Well, it’s kind of complicated to explain.”

“Uncomplicate it then.” Jeno demanded.

“Geez, I’m on it. So bossy. As I was saying, it was kind of complicated because you probably won’t believe me if I told you. But seeing as you saw her, I think this is going to be my first time telling this story to people who will believe me. What you saw was my great, great grand aunt. The original owner of the house.” When the two just gaped at him, Donghyuck continued. “I know, she’s supposed to be dead and all. What you saw- she doesn’t have eyes and tongue, right? She may look gruesome but she won’t harm you. She’s really nice and she guards the house from evil spirits. My parents said she was killed in her own property, just by the lawn in front of the library because the townsfolk accused her of practicing dark magic. You know how it was in the past. Turns out, she was just studying chemistry and the people thought she was studying magic. It was bullshit really. She didn’t deserve the torture she was put.”

Renjun bit his lip and shook his head. “That was horrible.”

“Yeah.” Donghyuck nodded, eyes looking distant for a moment. “But now she guards the house and protect the people in it so they wouldn’t experience the same injustice she had faced.”

Jeno let out a sigh and thumped his head on the headrest of his seat. “Jesus Christ, I can’t believe this is actually real.”

“You saw it. You knew it was real. There was no way she would disappear in front of our eyes in that distance and fake it.” Renjun said.

“Anyway! She’s really harmless. I promise. I’ve been seeing her roam around the house, especially in the library, since I was a kid and she’s never hurt anyone.” Donghyuck cheerfully said and turned around to put the car out of park and drove.

“You could’ve at least warned us.” Jeno grumbled.

Donghyuck giggled. “Sorry. I was busy hosting a party.”

Renjun groaned and let the relief wash over him. “I probably would’ve shit myself if it was just me who saw your great, great grand aunt. No offense.”

“Thank God for me I guess.” Jeno voiced out and Renjun laughed for the first time after the incident when he saw that the other looked like he regretted following Renjun to the library.

\---

He and Jeno had never talked about the woman in the library after that night but they knew it happened. They both knew it was real. And they both knew it wasn’t just a figment of their intoxicated imagination. Something as vivid and strikingly terrifying like that- they knew it was a real apparition.

Renjun had always believed in the supernatural, but he wasn’t expecting it to be as ghastly like what he witnessed. Maybe the woman was asking for help, or she just didn’t want to be alone, and Renjun felt bad for that, he really did, but he knew that what’s dead should always stay dead. There was a reason why their worlds were divided and he was sure that it would just bring imbalance to the spiritual equilibrium if they were to disturb that thin line dividing the two worlds.

Grateful for the fact that Donghyuck was right and nothing bad happened or nothing remotely close to it had made itself known to them over the past few busy days that had passed, Renjun had long put the event at the back of his mind as an unforgettable memory. He lived in the real world and there was a more pressing matter to him than a gruesome apparition of a ghost and that was the kiss he and Jeno had shared.

Renjun made out with Jeno Lee. His ex-roommate. His friend. Who was supposed to be going out with Donghyuck but Donghyuck seemed to be cheerful and cool about the recent update about Renjun’s relationship with Jeno, like he was expecting it to happen and he was genuinely excited for the two. Which he shouldn’t be because there was nothing between Jeno and Renjun. Unfortunately.

They just made out in front of the spirit of his dead great, great grand aunt in a party. Nothing unusual with that.

What was unusual though, was that Jeno and Renjun seemed to always find themselves making out with each other whenever Renjun goes to Jeno’s dorm room to study. Renjun wasn’t sure if studying was even the reason anymore as to why he’s always hanging out in Jeno’s room, or if it was because of Jeno’s addicting kisses.

Based on Renjun’s position splayed on top of Jeno’s chest right now, probably the latter.

Jeno’s head was propped on his pillow, his hands caressing the skin of Renjun’s hips under his shirt as Renjun gently sucked on the other’s lower lip, eyelids heavy and mouth throbbing from the intensity of Jeno’s kisses a while ago. Now, their kisses had turned languid and lazy as the two tried to catch their breaths on each other’s mouth, not willing to part.

Renjun gave Jeno’s lips one last quick peck before collapsing on the other’s side, chest heaving as he stared on the ceiling.

He liked Jeno, that much was obvious. But the question was, did Jeno like him the way Renjun did or did he just like making out with Renjun?

Renjun was scared to ask. He might not like the answer.

“Why do I still expect a bloody ghost to appear after every time I kiss you?” Jeno rasped out of the blue.

The brought out a surprise chuckle from Renjun and he softly hit Jeno’s stomach absentmindedly. “Ew. Gross.”

Jeno joined him in his laughter. “Shit. I still can’t believe our first kiss was that memorable.”

“I don’t ever want to experience that again.” Renjun visibly shivered at the thought. “No offense to Donghyuck’s dead relative, of course.”

“Will you stay?” Jeno whispered all of a sudden.

Renjun turned to the other and saw Jeno staring at him already with a solemn look in his eyes and all the focus in the world. In that moment, Renjun felt that Jeno wanted him to stay, not because he was scared to be alone, but because he wanted to be with Renjun.

“Of course, I’ll stay.” He simply replied.

Renjun meant it more than what Jeno was probably asking for. And he made sure the other knew that by turning on his side and reaching out to brush the stray hair out of Jeno’s forehead. Jeno reciprocated the affection by turning his body to Renjun and putting his arm around his waist to hug him tighter, pulling him closer. And if that wasn’t close enough, Jeno tucked his head on the crook of Renjun’s neck and breathed his scent in.

“I wish you never left our room.” Jeno muttered on his skin.

Renjun smiled at that. “I’m already always here everyday, Jeno.”

“Yeah, but it’s different.” Jeno sighed and Renjun’s body shivered at the hot breath on his neck. “You still sleep most of the time in your own dorm.”

“And that’s a bad thing because?”

“I can’t have my cuddles when you’re there.” Jeno hugged him tighter if that was even possible anymore considering their intimate proximity already. Renjun felt his heart lurched into his throat. Jeno was really not good for his health.

At that moment, Renjun was content with what he had with Jeno. He realized he didn’t have to complicate it more by rushing in, because everything would just fall perfectly into place when the right time comes. And even if there would be an obstacle that would thwart the progress in the near future, Renjun would just have to deal with it one day at a time.

 _Baby steps_ , Renjun firmly decided as he placed a tender kiss on Jeno’s temple.

\---

“Hey, I brought food.” Jeno announced from the front door, tossing the keys to the bow beside him.

It was a week before the start of the new semester and Jeno and Renjun decided to just rent out an apartment together outside the university. The move was inevitable, to Jeno’s opinion, with how much the Chinese vixen had spent his time hanging out in his narrow dorm room, leaving his own much spacious shared dorm with Donghyuck to wiggle his way into Jeno’s own bed.

Jeno couldn’t remember who thought of the idea that they should just rent out a place together. But he remembered that Renjun’s smile was so bright and his eyes had stars in them when they signed the lease contract. _Home_ , Jeno remembered vividly how the word fell out of Renjun’s lips so naturally, and a feeling settled in his bones as if the word had embraced him then.

The apartment was relatively small and only had one bedroom but that feat was overlooked considering the two couldn’t sleep at night anymore without the other’s warmth beside them. The place was fifteen minutes away from their university too. A little bit pricey but he and Renjun could afford it. And the apartment was located in a quiet neighborhood.

Jeno frowned. Too quiet for an unpacking Renjun, in fact. He looked around the small space that was littered with opened boxes and found no one. His frown deepened.

“Renjun?” Jeno carefully called out, walking cautiously, his heart suddenly thudding loudly.

A cold feeling pressed against the back of his neck, and the hair on his body stood in alarm. Jeno felt his heart stuttered in its run, dropping the pizza box on the floor without a care as he whipped around with a scream.

Renjun’s melodious laughter filled the entire room. Jeno’s eyes landed on the other man who was doubled over, one of his hands clutching what seemed to be a melting ice cube. His own chest heaved as he tried to catch his breath.

“Christ! Don’t ever do that, you fucker!” Jeno yelled, clearly shaken by the scare. He lifted a hand to warm the back of his neck and noticed that it was slightly damp. _Stupid Renjun_.

“You should’ve seen your face!” Renjun wheezed, pointing at him and eyes tearing up a little.

“Ha-ha. Very funny. You made me drop our dinner.” Jeno huffed, picking up the pizza box and placing it on the center table. He saw Renjun wiped the unshed tears at the side of his eyes and popped the ice cube in his mouth, chewing it with a crunch.

“Aww, did our _wittle_ _skweptic Jweno Wee_ got scared?” Renjun hopped on the couch and wrapped his arms around Jeno from the back, resting his chin on his shoulder with a grin.

Jeno only scoffed and eyed Renjun who was peering at him through his lashes. Renjun was breathtaking like that- his face was bright and bare, light blemishes marred his otherwise flawless skin but it didn’t matter. Renjun was perfect to Jeno, he would always be.

“You’re an asshole.” Jeno grumbled.

“I’m _your_ asshole.” Renjun scrunched his nose as if only realizing what he had just said and that erupted a giggle out of Jeno. “Ew. No. I take that back.” The other pushed Jeno whose giggles ended up in a full blown laughing fit as he laid on his side on the couch.

Renjun blew a raspberry. “Whatever. Come on, Mr. I-Don’t-Believe-In-Ghosts, let’s dine. I’m famished.”

“Okay, _baby_.” Jeno said, mindless, reaching over to the pizza box. Shortly, he stopped when he noticed how still Renjun was beside him and looked over. Renjun’s face was red, his eyes were wide, a little glassy, as they bore into Jeno’s lips, his own lips parted in surprise. Renjun looked flustered. Realization dawned on Jeno like the gears of a machine finally putting into work, a silent gasp emitting from him.

“So that’s what you like to get called, huh?” Jeno breathed. This was like a loud alarm clock to Renjun, who blinked like he had just woken up from a dream.

“Shut up.” Renjun just murmured, his cheeks tinting in cherry. But Jeno learned something new that day. And he made sure that he will use it to the fullest.

“Whatever you say.” He said instead, grinning at the other knowingly.

\---


End file.
